Retired Colonel Carl Pfeiffer’s new book, It Never Ends: The Terrible Life of Carl, is a memoir of stories about Pfeiffer’s childhood, told in a humorous, somewhat sarcastic  narrated voice.

By Dahlia Ghabour

Carl Pfeiffer is a Lithia resident and retired Colonel who has just published his first book, It Never Ends: The Terrible Life of Carl Pfeiffer. The book is not an army book—it is essentially his life story, a memoir that encompasses a series of stories about his childhood that Pfeiffer had been telling his whole life. “Every time I told the stories at social events or work, people would either laugh or cry,” said Pfeiffer. “And then they would tell me, you should write a book. So I did.”

“I haven’t had a terrible life,” said Pfeiffer, commenting on the title of the book. “I chose that word because it’s funny. I’ve had a pretty average life. Most people who read this book, who have like experiences, will say ‘well, your life was terrible.’ Your life is what you make it. Your life is terrible if you let it be terrible,” Pfeiffer added.

What ties this story together is the humor and the conversational style of writing. It’s full of letters, photographs and emails that prove the events Pfeiffer wrote about really happened—and they all did. The events were all true—the bullying he dealt with as a child, struggles with his parents and more. Some of the names were changed or characters composited for a bubble of anonymity, but everything was true.

A friend mentioned that if he were a guidance counselor, he would give It Never Ends to kids who are having trouble not getting good grades, making friends, or just struggling to be teenagers. “That’s when my wife started prodding me to publish it,” Pfieffer said. “It took two years to write and then I spent a year deliberating about publishing, because it’s a very personal story. But my wife said there might be some kid out there who would want to read my story, and know that it can end the way you want it to. That’s when I decided to publish it.”

Pfeiffer’s book is $19.95 and can be found on, The sequel, entitled It Never Ends: Comrades, Crimes and Conspiracies will be published late August 2012.

For more information, visit The Terrible Life of Carl Facebook page or e-mail

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